Bert is Evil!

First Japan, next the world!

On a trip to Japan one of our investigators stumbled into a Japanese Citizen Only section in the city of Kagoshima. While trying to avoid authorities, him and his mates ran past a Pachinko Game Parlor where they came across that which is captured in these startling photos! A Big Brother esc type image of Bert staring down from a sign and a life-size mechanical replica, speaking Japanese, at street level.
Most of the patrons of this Pachinko Parlor (Pachinko, a gambling game played on a vertical pinball machine) looked to be quite addicted and hypnotized by the voice of Bert that was being piped through loud speakers. After translation the robotic Bert was apparently saying, "Brother Bert loves you. Rice rations up 12%".
After much investigation we have come to the conclusion that Bert came to Japan with the extraordinary claim of being a genetically engineered Super-Oriental from the future. Having immunity to all germs and diseases, an incredibly high intelligence, and the ability to work long tireless hours making cheap cost effective Sony Electronics. Due to his yellow skin and dark hair, the highest Government officials were fooled into believing his coming was to lead their people to victory. From then on his image was slowly leaked into the consciousness of the people and they have gradually come to except him. With Japan under his thumb we believe he is now branching out to other oriental countries. With the aid of Ernie (being forced by threats of death), Bert is using his pal's darker skin tone to infiltrate the Philippines.
As further evidence I have proof by way of this Chinese Propaganda Poster. We further believe that once Bert has taken control of all the Oriental Nations and rule them with an Iron Fist he will move to take over the World! God Save us all.

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